My Point of View

Just the other night, I had a strange dream. I was in the hospital with cancer and my mom became so worried about me that she made herself sick. I walked up next to her and said, "Ye of little faith, why are you afraid? I'm the one with cancer and I'm not even afraid. Why would I be with Jesus by my side." It's not that I thought I was bigger than the cancer, it was that I knew God was going to take care of me, no matter what may come, until my purpose on this earth had been served. In other words, I knew my song had not been sung yet.

You see, I believe God speaks to me in my dreams and my thoughts. He teaches me things about life little by little without actually coming down to earth and telling me to my face. What I learned in that dream was something I should have realized a long time ago.

When I had my horrible experience of a senior year in high school, I thought I had to start living life for me, put my needs first, and focus on my life. I've realized however that is the relative definition of the word "selfish". To think that this life, your life, is about you.

The reality of it is, this life, my life, is about more than just me. It's about those I help and inspire. It's about how I use the gifts God gave me to help and inspire others. It's about allowing God to lead my footsteps, not my brain. All this doesn't mean losing sight of who I am, my sense of individuality, and my purpose in life, it means that my purpose has to do with those around me. If I take care of others and do what God asks of me, he will take care of me.

I may not know my full purpose in life or what God has in store for my future, but I do know that I want to change the lives of others while learning about mine. Whether I touch the hearts of millions or the heart of one, all I know is that I am going to do something great. When I do, God's name is the only one receiving the glory and the praise.

Drying my Tears

Things don’t feel like they should.
Or maybe things just feel different.
Things feel like they are falling apart all around me.
Whatever it is, I feel as if I can’t stop it.

I sit here thinking of both the past and the present.
I feel the tears rolling down my face.
As if waterfalls came out of nowhere.
I feel as if I can’t stop it.

I put away his things.
Thinking that maybe it will help.
But the pain is still here.
The hurt is something I can’t stop.

What happens now?
What does my future hold?
Did I do the right thing?
All of these questions that I can’t stop.

I find my devotional next to me.
I begin to read it to myself.
One particular line grabs a hold of me.
“GOD wants to dry your tears”.

It’s time to try something new.
It’s time to face my fear of change.
It’s time to begin the healing process.
It’s time to dry my tears.

GOD is with me now.
Just like He always has been.
I need to trust in him.
I need to dry my tears.

Life is not ending,
Yet it is just beginning.
It doesn’t matter what anyone may say.
I am finally drying my tears.

My Message To The World

There is a difference between sexy and beautiful. Most women and teens feel that they can not be one without the other. As for me, I do not want to be looked at as sexy. Calling me things like hot or attractive makes me feel like you are only looking at body parts attached to a pretty face. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy going to the beach in a two piece to show off my body every now and then, but I am more than a pretty face. I am a human being, not a sweet dessert you can enjoy for a while and then store for later when you have had your fill. If you can not get past my looks and see me for me, you don't truly love me. I rather be called beautiful, ravishing, or radiant. I know I am not perfect, but I will prove to the world that I am not a force to be reckoned with. Love me for me or don't love me at all.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the LORD will be greatly praised. (Proverbs 31:30 NLT)